I LIVE VICARIOUSLY THROUGH YOU

It was a normal day in the studio when my client, Becky, turned towards me and asked, “What’s Next.”

Many clients ask me, “What’s Next” when it comes to their next hair appointment, permanent makeup procedure, or skin care correction treatments, but I could tell by the way Becky asked me her question, she was referring to something different. I looked at her and asked, “What do you mean by what’s next?” And Becky’s response caught me by surprise when she asked me, “When are you planning your next trip?” I had not shared with her the thoughts in my mind that had been circling around for the past several weeks. I answered her back with, “You know, this question has been on my heart, but I’m not sure what’s next for me right now. It is not clear to me”

Becky came back with this next statement that left me without words when she said to me, “I live vicariously through you!”

I could feel her excitement as it left me in a state of awe. Not really sure what she meant, I silently took in a gulp of air before asking Becky, “What does it mean to live vicariously through me? I’ve never had someone say this to me before.” Without hesitation she went on to tell me how her responsibilities, and her, as well as her husband’s health won’t allow her to take trips like I do. She went on to say, “I love to hear your stories about how God shows up to bring you clarity on these journeys, the places you travel to, the things you see, and the pictures you share help me to experience it along with you. And she finished with, “Your adventures have allowed me to live vicariously through you.”

This brought tears to my eyes to know that someone found peace through my crazy actions. I remember the first time I loaded up my vehicle in a desperate attempt to hear the still, small voice of God when I needed to have clarity and calmness in the chaos that was circling around in my mind.

My eyes began to swell a bit as I heard her tell me how my travels impacted her life and strengthened her relationship with God. She shared that she could see how much I grow from these experiences, and how it gives her the desire to become a better version of herself. I could feel this tugging at my heart as I watched her lips move at every word she spoke with such excitement for my next excursion. Her excitement was encouraging me to move forward with taking a chance in time, and that timing being now.

Have you ever watched someone’s lips and expressions as they are talking to you while you remain in complete silence. Giving them the space to speak freely, and experiencing how it opens your eyes to a different awareness? Many times we are so eager to say our words in response that we don’t allow ourselves to embrace the beatitudes one may be trying to share with us. How many people can you count in your life that give you life breathing words?

By this I mean words that give you the extreme sense that you can accomplish anything you set your mind to. Words that express to you that you are capable, you are enough. You are worthy!

I remember an occasion in 2018 where 6 of us had gotten together to have a meal at a local restaurant to see what was next on trying to find a way to help me transform my property into a place of need for people who struggle with mental illness. My friend, Kevin had just started dating a young woman a few months before, and she was the newbie in our group of six sitting at our round table of motivated thinkers. We had been gathering together sharing our ideas at what we were doing for the greater good in our community.

One couple, Lorri and Paul, would pick up a group of kids from a neighborhood where kids were forgotten by their adults, and left to roam aimlessly. Lorri and Paul would give them rides to and from youth groups at their church to learn about God. Their hope was to instill a desire to stay away from the drug scene that was so prevalent around these young kids. Kevin helped his elderly friends close up their business every night, and make sure they made it to the banks night deposit and home safely. Now tonight was me sharing my story of what I felt my calling was…

I had put together a full presentation to show my round table of friends my hopes for transforming my property into housing for people of need before going in front of the board of township trustees. As I was giving my speech this bellowing voice from the edge of the round table asked, “And who’s going to make the money from this?” After thinking for a few seconds I said, “Well, I don’t have all those details figured out, but it’s going to take time, money, and a whole lot of energy to bring this all together.” Then without hesitation she blurted her next question, “Why should you get paid?” With a demanding and specific tone to her voice.

Immediately I thought, “Yeah, Alisa, why should you get paid?” Isn’t it interesting how a few words can make us feel unworthy of receiving something you really want for the greater good? Or a few words can give you the feeling of deserving more and receiving the richness of what life wants to offer you? Polar opposites!

I had a heart to help others in need. I knew money was needed for this vision to come into fruition, but now I allowed these feeling of unworthiness to stand in the way of building this dream for others who desperately needed what I was proposing to give them. Her words pierced through me and held me to my chair making my words seem without meaning as my burning desire got splashed with buckets of water, and my voice dried up like a desert along with my dream. At least for a while.

These are two iconic occasions I bring up because both of these experiences caused me to create change for the better in my life. Cause and effect. I’m sure you can think of times where you’ve had similar experiences both for the good and for the bad. How did these experiences make you feel? Has your life gotten better, has it remained the same, or have you found yourself spiraling downward, and stumbling through life where you feel tossed by the wind?

Although, these experiences are polar opposite of one another both are very necessary for our overall, well grounded growth. And, whether we like it or not we’re going to have these types of experiences throughout our lives. It isn’t about the experiences we go through, it’s how we get through these challenging times that mean everything my friends!

As I was looking at Becky speak, I noticed how her words gave me life. She brought me hope. I was recognizing the power behind being able to be of service to those around me in a way I didn’t realize I was. I felt expansive, and capable of achievement for a deep desired dream. Where the newbie made me feel constricted, and without value. I felt unworthy of accomplishing my dream, and foolish for thinking I could have ever accomplished such a task.

Both these experiences have impacted my life in a positive way even though if I wanted to I could lean in on those old, negative feelings of unworthiness by remaining stifled and drowning in my past by reliving this uncomfortable situation over and over in my mind like many of us have done at times. But, instead I chose to get into my car and take these travels to hear God’s voice so I could sift through the confusion in my mind scrambling in this never-ending circle. Traveling the country side to find out where God is when I couldn’t feel his presence.

Now I’m learning these times of pause I’ve taken have turned out to inspire others. How iconically great is this?!!!

Here we are moving forward from year 2017 to who Alisa has transformed into in year 2025. This is another time I can express, I would need a telescope to see where I have grown from. Our travels in life are all part of shaping and molding us, and there are always people watching how we respond and what we are doing with these whirlwinds life tries to sweep us up into.

There are people, experiences and vessels strategically placed to help us learn how to use our voice, and to recognize we have the ability to give people the feeling of more life, or to deplete them of it. We can use our power for the good, or for the bad! My desire is always to help you grow by sharing the tools I’ve gathered on my journey through this world. To help you find the stronger, more grounded super human within you that brings you both harmony and peace in your life. How do we love when it’s difficult to love someone? The newest version of my book, MY ROOM OF TEARS, is being released soon to help us love ourselves as well as those who are difficult to love.

Sometimes maneuvering through life can be painful, but along with the pain we receive trinkets of goodness that give us an uncontrollable desire to share our experiences with others to help them connect with a life they love living too.

I thank you for taking time to surf through A Quest For Christ website and I invite you to leave any questions or comments below. Watch for the new release of MY ROOM OF TEARS, and I hope you too will find your way to a life where you feel deserving of receiving. The first step you must take is recognizing that you have been designed with a purpose and have tremendous value to an All Knowing God who loves you. Feel a big hug!